“…It’s ten past seven and you’re listening to Triple M. before we get to the weather, we should tell you that after eight this morning, we have everyone’s favorite Immigration Minister, the lovely Philip Ruddock coming in. And the sweetest thing, he’s like a cuddly kitten, Paul McDermott will be dropping by…”

Gina reluctantly opened her eyes as she felt the warmth from Paul’s body still next to hers. One of his arms was still draped around her even though it lay limp against her stomach. She turned over, propping herself up on one elbow and watched him sleeping. He looked like a bucketful of ice wouldn’t even have made him stir. Gina traced a finger down his chest, stopping at where the covers just covered him. Paul’s mouth turned into a smile and he opened one eye.

“Morning,” he mumbled.

“Yes it is,” Gina replied coyly. “I know it’s early, but ah, do you have somewhere to be this morning?”

Paul’s expression went from amusement to pure horror and he sat bolt-upright. “Fuck, I forgot Tai Chi!” he cussed and smacked himself in the head with his palm. Paul threw back the covers and began searching for his underwear.

“Actually, I wasn’t even thinking about Freya,” Gina huffed as she slid out of bed and grabbed her satin robe from where it lay draped over a chair.

“There’s somewhere else I was supposed to be?” Paul asked baffled as he pulled on his boxers and searched for his jeans.

Gina looked at her radio that was still spewing out breakfast show banter and crossed her arms. Paul’s eyes went wide and he stopped doing up his belt.

“Fuck I’m supposed to be on radio in under and hour. Fuckfuckfuck,” he whined, grabbing his shirt from where it was sprawled on the dresser.

“Well now you’re screwed, aren’t you? Do you go apologizing profusely to Freya or rush off to the radio station to piss fart about with Mikey?” Gina asked as Paul pulled on one sock and then went on a mad search for the other.

“Well, I can call Freya on the way,” Paul replied as he dropped to his knees to look under the bed and then pulled out his sock, which looked like Lewis had been trying to reproduce with it. He pulled it on anyway and looked back at Gina who was still standing arms crossed and wearing an expression that said she was extremely pissed off. “What?” he asked innocently as he got to his feet.

“It was nice to spend the night with you too,” she spat and headed for the door.

“Wait!” he cried as he leapt toward her, but he smacked his leg on the dresser and let out a yelp. “Christ,” he winced and hobbled to where Gina had stopped near the door.

“Oh, here we go, what’s your excuse this time? ‘If I don’t talk to Freya she’ll remove my prostate with a fondue fork’?” Gina huffed.

“Genie,” Paul sighed, going for his best ‘I’m a weak, pathetic man please don’t hurt me’ look. “I didn’t mean for it to sounds like I didn’t care about last night. Last night was great, beautiful, I loved being with you, don’t think that my missing Tai Chi or running seriously late for a radio interview means I don’t care. I just don’t want to upset Freya or let down Mikey.”

Gina was struggling not to cave in. “Why are you even thinking about Freya? Do I actually mean anything to you other than an easy fuck?”

He looked even more sorry and slid a hand onto her cheek, lifting her chin so she’d look at him. “I love you. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

“Then why are you with her?” Gina breathed.

“I was lonely when you were gone, she filled the void, kinda,” Paul mumbled. “But I miss you.”

Gina gave up trying to be angry and wrapped her arms around him. “I love you too,” she whispered against his lips.

Fenny woke to the feeling of soft lips against her neck and warm hands caressing her body. She fought a contented moan and rolled over to engulf Brad in a kiss, her hands stroking his bare flesh.

“And a very good morning to you too,” Brad perked as he managed to pry his lips away from hers.

“Aw, don’t stop,” she cooed and then yawned. “What time is it?”

“Too early,” he smiled and passed Fenny her glasses, which were on the floor next to his side of the bed. She slipped them on and grabbed the clock radio.

“Twenty past seven,” she breathed and shoved it back on the bedside table before she stretched one hand, allowing it to find its way to ruffle Brad’s hair.

“So, what have you got planned for today? The idiot’s guide to Sydney hosted by Andrew Timms, top wanker and utter chauvinist?”

“Crap,” she gasped and sat up. “I completely forgot about Andy.”

“Am I the only one not seeing a problem here?” Brad mused as Fenny leapt out of bed and started pulling on her clothes.

“He’ll kill me for not coming back to the hotel,” she huffed as she bounced on one foot, trying to get her socks on.

“So don’t go back, stay with me,” he chirped and reached out, wrapping an arm around Fenny and pulling her backwards onto the bed.

“I can’t, you know I can’t,” Fenny declared as Brad caught her in a kiss. She felt herself being drawn back toward him, but pulled herself away and tumbled off the bed. “I can’t, Brad, okay, I just…” She cut herself off and looked in the immediate area for a hairbrush.

“Well, will I even see you again?” he whined, climbing out of bed with a sheet wrapped around his waist.

“Do you think I can keep away?” she smiled and looked down at Brad’s sheet. She stood on her toes to kiss him. He wrapped his arms around her and she began to giggle.

“What? What have I done?” he asked, confused.

“Lost your sheet,” Fenny mused as the both looked down and realised Brad was standing in the middle of the room butt naked.

“I’ll stay like this until you return,” he declared as Fenny, in a fit of giggles, took one last glance and left the room.

She ran straight into Gina who was looking far too happy to be even remotely normal.

“Good morning, wasn’t expecting to see you here?” Gina mused.

“Neither was I, can I borrow a brush?” Fenny asked, somewhat rushed.

“Sure. Go ahead,” Gina perked. “What’s with all the angst?”

“Andy is going to kill me,” Fenny said in a hushed voice as she headed for Gina’s room. “Paul’s not naked in there is he?”

“No, he left, he’s due on the radio sometime soon,” Gina smiled.

“I’m going to assume things went well with you two,” Fenny said, returning the smile.

“It’s all cherry ripe,” Gina winked. Fenny shook her head, finding that very hard to believe.

“Oh, are you on your way to work?” Fenny added before she entered the bedroom.

“Sure am,” Gina replied, grabbing her bag.

“Can you give me a lift back to the hotel?” Fenny asked.

“Yeah, better be quick…I’m leaving in half a second,” Gina chided as she headed for the door.

Fenny dashed into Gina’s bedroom, snatched up the brush and bounded back out. “Ok, let’s go.”

“Come on, come on, answer, god dammit,” Paul muttered as he paced the hallway outside the studio at Triple M, his phone clasped to his ear. “Come on, answer you neurotic fucking…”

“Go to hell,” Freya hissed.

“Freya, baby listen, I’m so, so sorry about this morning.”

“Don’t lie to me, Paul.”

“Baby, I wouldn’t lie to you, I love Tai Chi, it cleanses my soul and it makes me feel like such a better person. In fact, missing the session is probably one of the reasons I feel so terrible about missing the session.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, it’s the whole karma thing, that and I forgot to have that delicious strawberry Soya drink we usually have for breakfast.”

“Paul, what the fuck are you doing little fella, you’re on in two minutes,” Mikey declared as he appeared from the studio

Paul covered the mouthpiece of the phone. “Apologising profusely, just fuck off and I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Don’t tell me, you got caught eating a Big Mac by the lovely Freya?” Mikey sarced.

“No, I missed Tai Chi,” Paul spat.

Mikey stifled a giggle. “What? You actually found your life again?”

“I spent the night with Gina,” Paul whispered.

“You are such a slut,” Mikey scolded. “Hold on, you spent the night with your wife, that’s a good thing…”

“Just fuck off,” Paul hissed.

“Fine, just don’t come crying to me when they all turn against you and you become the next John Wayne Bobbit,” Mikey chided and disappeared back into he studio.

“Fucking deadshit,” Paul spat then realised he wasn’t covering the phone. “Not you, no, you’re lovely and beautiful.”

“Whatever Paul, the one thing I ask you to do…”

“Look, baby, I’ve really gotta go but I promise to make it up to you. Dinner at your favorite restaurant, we can see that movie you want, copious glasses of dandelion wine, it’ll be great.”

There was a brief silence. “Okay, I’ll forgive you this time, but only because I love you.”

Paul let out a sigh of relief. “You too, have to go, in the shit,” he added and hung up.

“PAUL,” Mikey scorned as he reappeared, grabbing Paul by the arm and dragging him into the studio.

Fenny flew out of the elevator and raced down the corridor to her room. She stopped outside the door and found herself gasping for breath. She straightened her clothes and then unlocked the door. Andy was standing looking out of the window in his favorite beige suit. He turned around slowly, his face a picture of fury.

“I thought you would have left by now,” Fenny breathed, closing the door behind her.

“I should have, over an hour ago,” he spat. “But I wanted to see if you’d come back.”

“Of course I was coming back,” Fenny countered. “Gina and I got talking, it was really late and I decided to stay the night. You can ask her if you don’t believe me.”

“Why didn’t you call?” he scorned.

“I forgot, I didn’t think you’d mind,” she cooed and sidled over to him. “I’m sorry.”

“I was worried sick,” he continued. “Anything could have happened to you, you know what this country is like.” Fenny had to turn away to fight a smile. She guessed now wasn’t a good time to tell him about playing Twister with a woman who once tried to kill her. “You think this is funny?” Andy snapped.

“Of course I don’t, but I’m a grown woman, and if I choose to stay the night with a friend, I will,” Fenny snapped back. “You don’t own me, Andrew.”

Andy’s nostrils flared as his temper rose. “It’s a shame, because you certainly need a good man to teach you how to be a good woman.”

Fenny’s mouth fell open in shock. “When I find one I’ll let you know.”

“I can’t believe you, Fenella. You embarrass me in front of my colleagues, you fuck off to god knows where and don’t come back. If I didn’t know you better I’d think you were fucking around behind my back,” he hissed.

“You know, you’re right, I am fucking around. That’s what I was doing, I was fucking Brad Sherwood senseless, and it was great,” she spat.

He looked mortified. “Oh grow up.”

“Don’t you have work to go to?” she scorned.

“Yes, which is a darn sight more than you do. What is it again? Oh, you’re an artist? I’ve seen better from children,” he sneered as he stormed out of the room.

“FUCK YOU,” she screamed and chucked the customary hotel Bible at the door. It collided with a loud bang and fell to the floor as Fenny stood clenching and unclenching her fists in anger.

Gina sauntered into her office and felt instant tension as Freya was once again at her desk. “What are you doing?” she huffed.

“Sorry, you’re the only person with a radio, Paul’s on,” Freya smiled sweetly and turned it up a little.

“Good for Paul,” Gina breathed, dropping her bag on the floor and standing over Freya in a subtle attempt to make her leave.

Now Pauly, we believe you have a song request? Yeah, the Whitlams – ‘No Aphrodisiac’ Any reason in particular? It’s for someone who knows who they are okay? Ohhh lovers. Get stuffed. Well, just for that person who knows who they are, here’s the Whitlams…

“I hate the Whitlams,” Freya announced. “Why would he chose them?”

“I don’t know, maybe you’re not the person he’s dedicating it to,” Gina shrugged.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Freya cussed. “He loves me.”

“How the hell should I know, I don’t know what goes on in his brain,” Gina cussed. “Now, I have work to do, go away.”

Freya pouted at Gina. “Why are you so grumpy?”

“Because you’re in my fucking face,” Gina spat.

Freya let out a huff and turned on her heel. Gina rolled her eyes, not caring that she’d offended the tofu freak. She slipped into her chair as she hummed along the radio.

Brad sauntered up the garden path, a selection of brochures from the letterbox in one hand, and knocked on the door. There was several seconds before the sound of footsteps approached and the door was opened.

“Brad,” Ritza gasped, not expecting to see him again, ever.

“Hey, you remembered,” he smiled and held out the brochures.

“Thanks,” she said cautiously. “Why are you here?”

“I thought you, me and Gus could go and have a day out.”

“What about Fenny?”

“She’s doing Andy things,” he replied, looking slightly dejected, but soon perked up again. “So, are you up for it?”

“Brad, you really don’t have…” she began but was cut off by Gus who appeared, scooted past her and grabbed Brad’s hand.

“Great you’re here, let’s go, Pokemon is about to start,” Gus declared and tugged Brad’s arm.

“Can’t argue with the kid,” Brad shrugged as he let himself be led into the house towards the sounds of the Pokemon theme music.

“…And then we’ll need to get the statistics from…” Andy stopped and glared around the table of executives. “Whose phone is that?” Everyone shrugged and fumbled through their briefcases to look, eventually Danny piped up,

“Sorry mate, it’s me…I’ll just…Yeah…” Danny muttered and hurried into the corridor. “Hello?”

“Hey Dan.”

“Fen, what the fuck! Do you want Andy to rip my balls off?”

“Oh, he’s still in a bad mood then?”

“Bad mood, he’s going apeshit.”

“That’d be my fault, we kinda had an argument this morning.”

“Kinda?”

“Well, okay, we did have an argument, I told him he didn’t own me. Didn’t go down too well.”

“Good, but what were you arguing about?”

“I spent the night with Brad. I told him so, too. Doesn’t believe me and thought I stayed out just to spite him, self-centered prick.”

“And it’s taken you how long to notice this?”

“Don’t start,” Fenny chided. “Can you get away?”

“I wish. I suspect Andy might have me followed by spies if I even nipped off to take a piss.”

“Damn, I had plans for us, too.”

“Fen, you’re back with Brad, what do you need me for?”

“You want a diagram?”

“Fen, I’ve got to go. There’s another party tonight, if you come we’ll catch up then.”

“You mean I have to endure another shitty party just to see you?”

“BRANNIGAN!” Andy yelled from the boardroom.

“Shit, Andy’s going spare. Tonight, okay?”

“Ok…” Fenny was greeted with the dial tone and chucked the phone onto the bed. Great, Brad was out and Danny was busy and Andy was fuming, now what was she supposed to do?

It was late in the afternoon when Gina was approached by Freya again, her head poked around the door.

“Gina,” she breathed.

“What?” Gina asked, not looking up from the screen.

“I just wanted to apologise for earlier. I mean you’re a really good friend and I’d hate for us to fall out,” Freya mumbled.

Gina looked up and avoided rolling her eyes. “It’s okay, I’m premenstrual, think nothing of it.”

“Great,” Freya beamed. “Anyway, I’ve got to get going, Paul and I are going for dinner, he’s such a sweetheart.”

“Yeah, a right darling,” Gina smiled as Freya disappeared. “Like cancer is darling or stapling someone’s head to a moving vehicle is darling.”

“I’m not going to ask,” Amanda mused, poking her head in the door.

“Good, because you won’t like the answer,” Gina replied, glaring at her screen.

“Does it involve serious injuries being inflicted on Freya?”

“Yes, yes it does.”

“Then I’m all for it. In fact, I’ll finance the entire operation,” Amanda chided.

“Aw, you’re too good to me,” Gina smiled as Amanda walked off chuckling to herself.

Paul read over the restaurant menu for the fifth time. The only thing that he figured would be edible was if you mixed the fried lentils with about half a gallon of ice cream from the ice cream parlour across the road. He was pondering the possibility of popping over the road and conning them into letting him fill his pockets with jellybeans when Freya appeared, her white, figure-hugging dress made see-through in the restaurant lighting. She floated over to Paul and planted a soft kiss on his cheek.

“Sorry I was so angry this morning,” she cooed.

“It’s ok,” Paul smiled. “I should have called or something.”

“So did you have fun with Gina last night?” she asked.

“Huh? Oh yeah, Fen was there too. We had cake,” he replied. “Just a little bit of cake, not a lot or anything you know…”

“And did you ask her?”

“About?”

“Her mystery man,” Freya chirped.

“You know, it didn’t come up in conversation.”

“Such a typical man,” she cussed and leaned over the table to brush her lips against his.

“Shall we order?” he asked, pulling away slightly. “I’m starving.”

“Sure,” she nodded, slightly dejected by Paul’s reaction.

“Did you see when that wave nearly knocked me out?” Gus perked as he scurried to the front door.

“That wasn’t a wave, it was barely a ripple,” Brad teased.

“Shoes off and straight into the bathroom,” Ritza ordered as she opened the door.

“Yeah, yeah,” Gus muttered, pulled off his sneakers and bolted down the hall.

“Thankyou so much for that, I haven’t been to the beach in ages,” Ritza perked as she carried the soggy towels into the laundry.

“Where do you want this?” Brad asked, motioning to the esky in his hand.

“Just put it in the kitchen,” Ritza replied as she piled everything into the washing machine and turned it on.

“Gus is quiet,” he announced, appearing at the laundry door.

“There’d be a first,” she mused. “I’ll go check,” she added and padded up the hallway.

Brad sauntered back into the living room as Ritza reappeared. “Would you believe he’s asleep?” she smiled. “You wore him out.”

“It’s a knack,” Brad shrugged and scratched his stomach. “Damn sand.”

“You’re welcome to have a shower if you want,” Ritza perked and pointed down the hall to the bathroom.

“I might just do that,” Brad nodded and made his way to the bathroom. He turned the shower on and let the room fill with steam as he stripped off his clothes. He’d just pulled his shorts off when Ritza walked in carrying a towel.

“Shit, I…Oh god…” She blushed. “Towel,” she added and hurriedly dropped it on the sink.

“Oh please, you’ve seen me naked loads of times,” he mused.

“Yeah but…God,” she gasped, trying to avert her eyes.

“You must be sandy too,” he announced, “and Gus is asleep…”

“Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?” she gasped.

“Only one way to find out,” he replied and slid into the shower.

Ritza looked at the slowly steaming room and at the door behind her. She was a single mother and Brad was gorgeous, offers just didn’t come along that often, so she started to undress.

Gina took to shopping after work to try to block out the negative thoughts that kept popping into her mind about Paul. She perused the various shop windows as she tottered about with the bags of crap she’d bought. She stopped to fix the cuff of her jeans outside a small restaurant and caught sight of two familiar figures, laughing and canoodling over glasses of what appeared to be wine. It was Freya and Paul, feeding each other and trading delicate kisses in a corner of the restaurant. Gina felt her heart sink. After the previous night and that morning, she’d thought everything was perfect. Obviously she was living under false hope. How could anything be fine if he wasn’t outright dumping his mistress? Gina thought about marching into the restaurant and dumping the contents of Paul’s meal over his head and pouring the rest of the wine over Freya’s white dress, but concluded it would achieve nothing and headed back to her car.

Fenny stood beside Andy as he prattled on to a yet another group of advertising cohorts. He’d come home in nothing less than a worse mood than he’d left in, and Fenny was sure he was going to tell her to get lost. He didn’t and calmed himself enough to tell her to frock up and come with him to the party. He warned her not to embarrass him and that they would leave together. Fenny felt a like child, but didn’t have the energy to argue. Besides, Danny was going to be there and as long as he was there, all was not lost.

She looked up for what felt like the millionth time and saw Danny propped against the buffet table. She waited for him to look in her direction but he didn’t. Then a skinny, bleached blonde in a strapless pink frock sidled over to him and slid her arms around his waist. Danny smiled and planted a soft kiss on her cheek.

“What are you — oh, Brannignan’s finally here,” Andy scorned.

“Who’s he with?” Fenny managed to ask.

“Sam. His fiancée. She’s a lovely girl, you could learn from her,” Andy muttered.

“Fiancée,” Fenny echoed, not meaning to.

“Yes, is that so hard to comprehend? She’s been overseas, just got back,” Andy breathed. “Come on, since you’re so interested I’ll introduce you.”

“No really, you don’t have to,” Fenny peeped as Andy almost dragged her across the room to Danny and Sam, who both looked up surprised. Danny looked at Fenny with an almost apologetic look in his eyes and she looked away — she was already feeling humiliated enough.

“Fenella, this is Sam, Sam, Fenella,” Andy said coolly.

“Fenny, she likes to be called Fenny,” Danny huffed. Sam gave him a curious look.

“Babe, can you get me another drink?” Sam asked, pouting at Danny.

“Sure, gorgeous,” Danny smiled.

“I wouldn’t mind a drink as well,” Andy piped up as he looked at Fenny.

“Point taken,” Fenny sighed as she walked with Danny toward the bar.

“I’m sorry about this,” Danny breathed.

“Nice of you to mention your fiancée,” Fenny hissed.

“I thought we’d broken up, then she turned up on my doorstep,” Danny sighed. “Do you know that feeling, when you really, really try to forget someone, and then the second they reappear it turns your whole bloody world upside down?”

“Yeah,” Fenny nodded as they stopped at the bar to wait for the bartender to finish with another businessman in an unflattering suit.

“You look stunning tonight, by the way. If Sam hadn’t…I would…yeah,” Danny breathed as he caught Fenny’s unimpressed look. The bartender wandered over. Fenny turned away and leaned her back against the bar as she scanned the room.

“Dan,” she announced.

“Two beers, a….” Danny stopped and looked at Fenny. “What?”

“Where have Andy and Sam gone?” Fenny asked.

“They’re over by the…” Danny paused. “By the…hey, where the fuck are they?”

“You must try this…” Freya announced, holding out yet another fork of goo to Paul, whose stomach lurched at the idea.

“Actually, I’m pretty full,” Paul lied as he dodged the fork.

“Aw, but it’s chick pea and cabbage,” she pouted.

“Really, it’s fine. That avocado and peach thing was enough,” he pleaded.

“Fine,” Freya sneered. “So, what are we going to do next?”

“Go see that movie, the cow woman or whatever it was,” Paul breathed.

“Oh yeah, I forgot. You’ll love it, it supposed to be really harrowing. I should have brought more tissues,” she babbled.

Paul wished he’d brought more tissues as well: to stuff in his ears. So far he’d been forced to endure lengthy conversations on why blue nail polish was better than pink according to the girls in accounts, why her new shampoo was great for dolphins, and how they could find out who Gina’s man was. Every time the conversation had fallen to Gina, Paul had wished to God that he were with her instead of stuck in some crappy vegetarian restaurant, starving, cranky and nauseated. His only hope was that he might actually get sex when they got home. It wasn’t much and would probably leave him feeling guilty enough to hunt out a Bible, but what else did he have to look forward to. Well, there was the possibility of catching a few hours sleep at the cinema, providing he didn’t snore and there were no kids or perverts in close vicinity.

Gina arrived home and was surprised to find it quiet and empty. She padded into the kitchen where a few envelopes had been hurriedly chucked onto the table. She picked them up and opened the first one, a bank statement. The next was an electricity bill and the third, council rates. The fourth envelope was unfamiliar. Gina thought it might have been junk mail and opened it with little enthusiasm. She unfolded the contents and froze; the words on the paper caused a lump to form in her throat. She wished it had been tacky junkmail instead of new divorce papers. Paul was claiming irreconcilable differences and Gina just wanted to cry.