31 – Wake Me up Before You Go Go

As the morning sun began to creep through the tatty blinds and moth-bitten curtains, Gina began to stir. She groggily attempted to get her bearings; she couldn’t remember where she was or how she’d gotten there. All she remembered was the hungry kisses, the soft words and the tiredness that ensued.

Gina couldn’t remember how she and Paul had got from the floor to beneath the covers, or how she’d managed to sleep all night with her head on his chest. What she did know was that if she could have stayed there, listening to his heartbeat and never moving, she would have been happy. But the overwhelming guilt, anguish and confusion that had sat on her shoulders since her previous dalliance with Greg was proving too much.

She gently lifted her head, knowing Paul was a light sleeper and prayed he didn’t wake as she sat up. He let out a sleepy groan and turned over. Gina thought he looked almost childlike and reached out to run her hand softly over his back. He didn’t stir, so she slid out of the bed and searched for her clothes. She found them scattered around the room and although they smelt less than attractive she pulled them on. She left the room without looking back.


Fenny woke to the feeling of soft lips against her neck. She let out a tired groan and turned over to face Brad. She couldn’t even get out a “good morning” before his hands slid around her waist and pulled her bare flesh against his. Fenny let her hands creep up Brad’s chest and through his hair as they kissed, slowly and passionately.

“Let’s stay here forever,” Brad mumbled between kisses, forcing his lips to leave hers. “We can get some land and grow oranges.”

“Orange farmers, huh?” Fenny mused.

“Do you actually farm oranges?” he asked, pulling away to look at her.

“I’d like to think you could,” she replied as he kissed her again.

“You sure it’s not a grower…an orange grower?” he queried.

“Not where I come from,” she breathed, pulling him back to her. She paused thoughtfully. “Although I think they grow in groves?”

“Orange grovers, then.” He rolled over and pinned Fenny to the bed. He took her hands and held them to the pillows, as their kissing became more intense. When she freed her hands she gently ran her nails down his back and felt his heart rate increase. To her surprise he stopped and looked her in the eye.

“What?” Fenny breathed.

“Do you know, Fenella Grey, that when we get back to the States…I might just marry you,” Brad whispered and then kissed her again.

Fenny was glad he kissed her. She wasn’t sure what to say.


Greg awoke feeling surprisingly rested. He stretched, rubbed his eyes and reached for his glasses. He sat up and scanned the room. The candles had burnt down and the half-eaten cake was still on the table. His clothes were discarded in various parts of the room, but there was nothing to indicate she’d been there. He’d been too tired to really think about what had happened the previous night. But now that he was awake, he felt cheated. Why had she left? He’d been romantic, the sex had been mind blowing, but she still felt the need to leave. What irked Greg even more was that she hadn’t noticed he wasn’t wearing his ring. His half of the world’s smallest handcuffs was gone. Unfortunately, the other half of hers was in the next room.

He clambered out of bed and grabbed his underwear from the floor, along with his jeans, and pulled them on. He blearily staggered into the bathroom and removed his glasses again to wash his face and wet his hair so it looked sort of decent. He then finished dressing and headed to the dining room for breakfast.

Greg wasn’t surprised to find no one else about, so he grabbed a newspaper and a coffee and took a seat at one of the tables. A few minutes later, Paul sauntered into the room. He noticed Greg and wandered over to join him.

“Good morning, Mr McDermott,” Greg perked as he turned the pages of the paper to look for a half-decent article to read.

“Yeah, you ordered yet?” Paul yawned.

“Only coffee, I thought I’d wait for everyone else. It looks less sad.”

Paul nodded. “Sleep well?” he asked, trying to make conversation.

“Eventually,” Greg smiled. “You?”

“You know me, like a baby,” Paul mused, trying to hide to disdain in his voice.

They fell into silence as Greg turned back to his paper and Paul clicked his tongue in frustration and anxiousness.

A few minutes later, Greg’s coffee was delivered and Fenny and Brad appeared. They were holding hands, giggling and glowing like a couple who’d only just made love for the first time.

Fenny had been relieved that Brad hadn’t broached the subject of marriage again, as she wasn’t quite sure how she felt about the whole idea. She also believed that it was not a good time to start discussing dresses, invitations and locations. Not that she’d been thinking about it, of course.

“Good morning,” Paul perked. “Did we have fun with our voracious love making?”

Fenny blushed and was tempted to chuck the sugar pot at Paul.

“Why, yes we did. Went through the entire Kama Sutra,” Brad replied cheerily.

Fenny fell into her seat and buried her face in her hands.

“Really? You do the whole initiate, lubricate and stimulate thing?” Paul queried.

“Of course we did,” Brad insisted.

“If you two don’t shut up I’m leaving,” Fenny declared, looking up.

“Not if I leave first,” Greg grumbled.

“Glad to see someone’s cheery this morning,” Brad sighed.

“Have you seen Genie?” Paul asked, changing the subject.

“No, not since we got here last night,” Fenny replied. “I’ll go look for her,” she added.

Fenny left the table and headed back upstairs to the four rooms they’d stayed in. She found Gina’s and knocked on the door. There was no reply.

“Gina, it’s Fen,” she called, feeling a bit foolish talking to a door. Fenny heard a shuffling sound and then the door opened; Gina’s face was puffy and her eyes red from crying. “What’s wrong?” Fenny asked as Gina let her in.

Gina wrapped her arms around herself and paced the room. “Am I a horrible person?” she asked.

“Horrible? No, you’ve gotten me and Brad back together more times than I can count, you risked beatings by Rona for me and you’re trying exceedingly hard to save your marriage and not hurt Greg,” Fenny replied.

“Then why do I feel such a whore?” Gina sobbed.

Fenny looked bewildered and shrugged.

“You know what I did last night? Greg wooed me with chocolate cake, which turned to kissing and frenzied animalistic sex,” Gina spat.

“That’s perfectly normal for you,” Fenny replied bluntly.

“Then, I showered, went to Paul’s room, told him that I loved him and we did it on the floor,” Gina sniffed. “I had sex with two guys in very short succession, I’m a whore.”

Fenny felt compelled to laugh. It wasn’t often Gina went into a complete tizzy, and she looked less pathetic and more comical than anything else.

“Oh kiddo, I’ve been there, and it’s not necessarily bad,” Fenny smiled warmly. “I know what Greg’s like, he’s a charmer. He could talk the knickers off a nun.”

Gina let out a giggle. “It’s not Greg I’m worried about.”

“In that case, he’s asking for Genie and is currently discussing the Kama Sutra with Brad,” Fenny mused.

“How am I supposed to go and eat breakfast with only one person I haven’t seen butt naked?” Gina sighed, feeling more composed.

“Hey, at least I’ll know what’s going through your head,” Fenny perked.

“He couldn’t even tell me he loved me,” Gina grumbled and sat on the bed.

Fenny looked at her a moment and then sat down. “Just because he doesn’t say it doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel it,” she announced. “Did I make a sentence there?”

“I think so,” Gina nodded.

“Anyway, you think you’ve got problems, Brad announced that he might want to marry me when we get back to the States,” Fenny huffed.

Gina looked at Fenny in shock. “Fen, why do you sound horrified? Do you know how many women would die for Brad to say that to them?”

“I know, I know. Be fun to annoy the Whosers, wouldn’t it?” Fenny grinned.

“Oh Fen, that’s so evil…I’m impressed,” Gina perked.

“Thank you. Don’t tell anyone else though, ok?” Fenny ordered.

“You have my word. Sure it’s the word of a journalist, but hey, I get the wedding exclusive,” Gina jeered.

“Are you ready to face breakfast now?” Fenny asked, getting to her feet.

“No, but I’ll try,” Gina whined.


Fenny and Gina arrived back in the dining room to find the guys were arguing over what to have for breakfast.

“Finally, we’re all dying of hunger out here,” Brad announced.

“Well you could have ordered,” Fenny declared, ruffling Brad’s hair on her way to sit down.

“We were going to but Greg and Paul started an all out war about what Gina would drink,” Brad chirped.

“Seriously?” Gina asked as she took a seat next Paul. Paul nodded. “I have a hankering for a chocolate milkshake.”

“Told ya,” Paul grinned. Greg sneered.

“For breakfast?” Fenny gasped.

“Yeah, does my choice of beverage bother you?” Gina asked.

“Not at all, think I might have one myself,” Fenny perked.

“Are you ready to order?” asked a waitress as she sidled up to the table with her pad and pen.

“I think so,” Brad mused. “We want two cooked breakfasts and a pot of coffee, scrambled eggs, toast, two chocolate milkshakes, a ham and pineapple jaffle and an Irish tea. You got all that?”

“I think so,” the waitress smiled and disappeared.


Halfway through their breakfasts, Greg decided to broach the subject no one wanted to discuss.

“So, what do we do now? About Ritza?” he asked, sipping his coffee.

“I’d be quite happy just to forget about her,” Brad scorned, shovelling more bacon into his mouth.

“Yeah, but you can’t do that. She’s not going to go away,” Paul declared, waving his fork about.

“We could kill her,” Fenny suggested as she pushed her scrambled eggs around the plate.

“Well, we are in South Australia,” Gina mused, reaching for her milkshake.

“Good point,” Paul perked, snatching the milkshake.

“Oi,” Gina scorned as Paul sucked half the milkshake into his mouth, before handing it back. “Great, now I’ve got Paul cooties on my straw,” Gina muttered.

“I’m sure that’s not the only place you’ve got Paul cooties,” Fenny jeered.

Brad nearly spat out his mouthful of coffee and Gina had to quickly wipe the horrified expression from her face.

“Oh Fen, just lower the tone, why don’t ya,” Paul scorned.

“So what are we going to do?” Greg hissed.

“Get a new straw,” Gina mused.

Fenny, Brad and Paul sniggered.

“I’m serious, I don’t want to be stuck in this hick town any longer than we have to,” Greg spat.

“Greg, calm down, man. None of us want to be here,” Paul said diplomatically.

“Then can we make a decision?” Greg huffed.

“You know what? We need to set a trap,” Gina announced.

“A trap? For Ritza?” Brad queried.

“Yeah, inflict a bit of what she inflicted on us. I mean she can’t be too far behind us,” Gina shrugged.

“But she thinks we’re dead,” Fenny countered.

“She’ll still be after Brad though, right?” Paul enthused.

“Are you suggesting using me as bait?” Brad gasped.

“That might actually work, man,” Greg nodded.

“So how do we set a trap?” Fenny asked.

“I don’t know, lead her on a wild goose chase for a while, until we work out the finer details,” Gina mused. “I’m not actually an expert on these things.”

“Well I’m in, I want that bitch to get everything she deserves,” Fenny declared.

“Me too,” Greg nodded.

“I’m already in the shit, but sure,” Paul sighed.

“Brad?” Fenny asked.

“Do I have a choice?” he asked.

“Not even close,” Fenny mused.


After breakfast, Brad and Fenny went back to grab the keys, while Gina, Paul and Greg went to wait at the car.

“Are you the radio again today?” Gina asked, smiling at Paul as they hovered around the beat up Gemini.

“Only if you help me,” Paul mused raising an eyebrow

“Oh god, me singing?” Gina gasped.

“You can’t be any worse than Fen,” Paul jeered.

“Gina,” Greg announced and sidled over. “Can I talk to you a minute?”

“Huh, oh…sure,” Gina flustered and turned to Greg. Paul caught a look from Greg that said, “fuck off,” so he decided to inspect the hotel sign.

“What’s wrong?” Gina asked, shoving her hands deep into her pockets.

“I wanted to know why you left last night,” Greg said in a hushed voice.

“I just wanted to get a really good night’s sleep, that’s all,” Gina replied, trying to avoid his eyes.

Greg brought his hand to her cheek, and then tilted her chin up. “I missed you this morning.”

“I promise that at the next place we stop, I’m all yours,” Gina smiled.

“I’ll hold you to that,” Greg said as he brought his lips to hers.

Gina took her hands from her pockets and entwined them in Greg’s. She knew she should have been concentrating on the kissing, but her mind froze when she realised the cold metal of his wedding band was missing.


Paul looked over from where he was pretending to admire some roses and felt a stab of jealously. If he’d been a bigger man he might have punched Greg, had he not felt so incensed he might have swaggered over and said something witty, and if he’d had the balls he would have told her he loved her.

Paul noticed one of the roses had broken off. He picked it up and admired its beauty for a moment. He then tore it into pieces and let the petals scatter at his feet.


“Brad,” Fenny giggled as he attempted to get her jeans off.

“Just enjoy it,” Brad mused and kissed her.

She pulled away. “They’re waiting on us, you know.”

“Who cares,” he laughed.

Fenny giggled at Brad’s teenage antics and then fell serious. “Actually, can we talk for a minute.”

He let go of her and looked suspicious. “Ok.”

She walked over and sat on the bed. She patted the spot next to her and He sat obediently.

“There’s two things I want to talk about, the first is this,” she announced and unbuttoned his shirt enough to point out the tattoo.

“You like it?” he asked.

“I think it’s an incredibly sweet gesture,” Fenny cooed.

“I have to be honest, I was a bit tipsy when I had it done. I just needed something to remind me you were real,” Brad said warmly.

“Why there, though?” Fenny asked, running her fingers over the tattoo.

“Because that’s where you’re most important to me,” Brad smiled.

Fenny felt her whole body tingle and pulled Brad into a kiss. She reluctantly pulled herself away again to ask her next question.

“Secondly, what happened with Ritza in the hotel room?” Fenny breathed, not willing to let go of Brad entirely.

Brad looked at the floor. “I didn’t want to,” he mumbled and nuzzled into her neck.

“But you did?” Fenny said, the words leaving a sour taste in her mouth.

“I couldn’t help it, I was naked, handcuffed to the bed, and there was a naked woman I was involved with for a long time. All men think with their dicks, it was purely biological…” he said bitterly.

“Brad, I love you,” Fenny breathed and stroked his hair. “Granted I’m not happy about the whole incident. Thank you for being honest, though.”

“I’m so sorry,” Brad said apologetically as he lifted his head to look at her.

“I know you are,” Fenny said with a small smile, and he brought his lips to hers again. She felt the temptation to just sink back onto the bed with him, but knew the others would be waiting.


“Finally,” Paul declared as Brad and Fenny wandered out of the hotel and over to the car. Gina pulled away from Greg to look.

“Ah, quit your whining,” Fenny jeered, Paul childishly gave her the finger while rubbing it up the side of his head.

“Who’s driving?” Greg asked, ignoring Paul.

“I don’t mind, I’m kinda used to the decrepit old thing,” Fenny perked, “and you can be my navigator,” she added and slapped Brad on the arse as she headed to the driver’s side door.

“Yes ma’am,” Brad grinned and headed to the passenger side.

“I want a window,” Gina declared and shoved Paul in the middle, much to Greg’s chagrin.

“Right, are we comfortable? Have we all been to the bathroom? Because I don’t want to get five miles down the road only to hear you wining that you need to pee,” Fenny announced.

“Yes mum,” Paul grinned in a baby voice.

“Can we just go,” Greg huffed.

“Which way we headed?” Brad asked.

“Oodnadatta,” Gina announced. “Wasn’t that Ritza’s next destination?”

“You’re a very smart woman,” Paul mused.

“I know,” Gina smiled.

“Oodnadatta or thereabouts it is then,” Fenny perked and started the engine. As she steered the car onto the main road, she realised it was going to be a very interesting trip with Brad’s ravenous libido, Greg’s vile mood and Gina and Paul’s obvious heavy flirtation. “Where’s my radio?” she announced.

“What do you want to hear today?” Paul asked.

“Hmm well yesterday was alternative, musicals and 70s rock. How about some 80s classics,” Fenny chirped.

“You up for ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go Go’?” Paul asked, poking Gina.

“Please, when aren’t I up for a good Wham song,” Gina giggled.

“Spare me,” Greg groaned as the rest of the car erupted into a chorus of singing.