Fenny braced herself and stared at the telephone. Brad had left with Lilly twenty minutes ago, demanding that she call her mother. What he had failed to notice during their many years together, however, was that Fenny’s family was not good at confrontation or discussing things. She’d never been told why her cousin Rae had gotten a sudden divorce from her husband Sam, she’d never been told why they lost their house when she was 12, she’d never been told what had happened to get her uncle Peter disowned from the family, and she had a sneaking suspicion that if her family had it their way, Fenny would follow Uncle Peter into the realm of obscurity. But if her mother was making the effort, she may as well follow through.

She hurriedly picked up the phone and dialed, listening to it ring anxiously. “Hello?”

“Oh. Hi Daddy, it’s me.”

“Hi Fenny, good to hear from you.”

“Yeah. How’re you doing?”

“Dexter’s can’t order the parts to fix my camera.”

“Your arm, Dad. How’s your arm?”

“It itches.”

Fenny shook her head and found herself smiling. Her father hadn’t changed. It was doubtful he ever would. “Is Mom around?”

“Yeah, she’s working.”

There was a pause.

“Can I talk to her?” Fenny asked.

“What, you want me to get up and use my crutches while holding the phone? Are you trying to kill me?”

“Just yell for her.”

“Fine.” He didn’t even bother covering the receiver and screamed loudly for his wife to answer the phone.

Fenny waited for her eardrums to stop buzzing and heard another phone click on. “Fenny, are you doing alright? We were all worried about you after you left like you did.”

“You were all worried?”

“Well I was worried. Your brother and sister are a bit miffed, and your father wanted your help fixing the camera.”

“Good to know everyone cares,” Fenny sighed. “But I am sorry about what I said to everyone. You know I’m not good at dealing with other human beings.”

“I know. It’ll blow over, they’ll get over it. Short attention spans.”

“Very true.” There was an awkward silence and Fenny knew what was coming.

“Why didn’t you tell us earlier, about you and Brad?” Louise asked. “I’d liked to have been told.”

“I don’t know,” Fenny sighed. “I figured you’d be upset.”

“And I am,” Louise huffed. “I’d have liked to have helped you plan the wedding, flowers, music, gowns, that sort of thing.”

“There wasn’t a lot of things to plan, it was about as simple a ceremony as you could get.”

“What was it like?”

“What, the wedding?”

“Yes. Well if I couldn’t be there for my oldest daughter’s wedding, I’d at least like to have a visual that I can delude myself into thinking was a real memory when I’m senile and sinking into dementia.”

Fenny smiled to herself. “It was on a Sydney beach at sunset with Gina and Paul, who renewed their vows too. We were in simple dresses, the guys were kinda beached up and everyone was a bit teary eyed. Then we went to dinner where Brad and Paul made fools of themselves by singing very sweet songs.”

“Sounds beautiful,” Louise sighed. “I’d like to meet your Paul and Gina one day.” Fenny managed to suppress a snicker, thinking about how those two would get along with her family and the chaos that would certainly ensue. “What am I supposed to tell the rest of the family?” Louise sighed.

“I dunno, that I’m married?” Fenny shrugged. “Half of them will probably be surprised I managed to get a guy at all, and the rest will be glad they didn’t have to sit through the ceremony or amazed because they thought I was gay.”

“That’s not true,” her mother chided. “Anyway, I’m sure it’ll resolve itself eventually. No use getting everyone worked up about it with a big announcement. Well it’s good to hear from you, and that you’re doing okay, but I should be getting back to work, I’ve really got to get this newsletter out by the end of the week, and your father’s running me ragged.”

“Alright, I’ve got some work to catch up on as well. If Daddy acts up just hit him with his crutches.”

“Hey,” David’s voice cut in.

“I love you too Daddy, even if you are eavesdropping.”

“Can’t get up to put the phone back. Tell Brad I say hi and ask him about those parts for the camera.”

“Bye guys,” Fenny sighed and quickly hung up before she could get sucked in.

Paul found himself smiling like an idiot as he headed up to his apartment, pleased with himself for completing Gina’s list of things to do, or at least all of the items he could actually remember. She had, after all, listed off his errands when she’d woken him up to say goodbye early that morning while she was absently stroking his hair, so his mind had been on other things than touch up painting and replacing the kitchen hardware. That and he wasn’t about to give the roof patching another go until he was certain the possum epidemic was well and truly over. He paused as he reached for his keys — he’d forgotten to call the council like Gina had asked the night before. Oh well, there was still plenty of time left in the day, and he was still proud of himself for finishing the painting of the rooms. They were one step closer to actually moving in permanently.

He opened the door and headed straight for the kitchen to grab himself a beer before diving back into packing. Rich was due in about half an hour to help him move the things from his studio and whatever else they could fit into his car. He cracked open his beer and took a grateful gulp as he headed for the hallway, only to nearly spit it out again as he rounded the corner.

With a sneer consisted more of annoyance and exasperation than real anger, he stormed to the couch where Freya was curled around a cushion, sound asleep and beginning to snore. He sat on the table and snatched up the key ring she’d left there and promptly removed the key to his apartment, hoping that she didn’t have any spares lurking around. He didn’t know what she was doing sleeping in his apartment, but she wouldn’t be doing so for very long.

With a shrug, Paul reached for his beer and in one graceful move of his arm, emptied its contents over Freya’s head. She leapt up sputtering and rubbing frantically at her face. Once she’d recovered she turned to face Paul, wide-eyed and shocked. Paul stared blankly at her as beer dripped past her eyes. “I don’t know what the hell you think you’re doing here you demented fucking harpy, but if you—”

“I was lonely Paul, and I just wanted to be nea—”

He quickly silenced her interruption with a simple gesture of his head. “But if you don’t get out of here in the next ten seconds I’ll have you arrested for trespassing, and if you ever dare come near me again I’ll slap a restraining order on you so fast your head’ll spin. And if you don’t leave my wife alone, well, let’s just say you’ll have bigger problems than legal actions to deal with. Now go on.” He dropped her keys in her lap and waited for her to move.

“But Paul, can’t we talk things through, I lo—”

“Go.”

Looking utterly defeated, Freya pulled herself from the sofa and to the front door. She paused as she stepped into the hallway and turned back, like something out of a bad black and white pre-war drama, probably planning some heart wrenching speech, but Paul was headed for the kitchen to get something to clean up the mess he’d made while trying to get to the last few drops of beer he’d not poured over Freya and his couch. Her face fell and she slipped out of the apartment with a huff.

Paul came back with a fresh beer and a dishtowel, wondering how Danny would react to the rather foul smell of stale beer imbedded in the sofa that would inevitably be worse by the time he got home. He also hoped that Freya made a scene going back into work with running makeup, matted hair, and dripping with beer. “And now to the weather report with Freya, our raging alcoholic who seems to have gotten herself in a pub brawl over her lunch break.” He could only hope Gina wouldn’t misconstrue things.

He gave up on trying to clean and got started packing up his paints, where he was quite surprised to find that his long lost number four round horsehair brush had been quietly nestled between his turpentine and gloss medium all along.

Brad watched with a smile as Lilly leapt from the swing and landed a bit sloppily in the sand before taking off with her newly found playmate, a little blonde girl who was probably a year older and just as rambunctious. They climbed over the playground equipment and paused on either side of the suspension bridge, giggling hysterically as a few older boys ran back and forth across it, making the bridge writhe and sway beneath them. It was good to get out of the house and let Lilly run off some of her energy. And probably even better to give Fenny a bit of time to herself.

He knew he probably shouldn’t have been, but he was secretly thrilled that Lilly had called Fenny “Mom.” Lilly still talked about her real mother and would probably be excited to go visit her as he’d promised Fenny she would, but to have his daughter so accepting and, quite possibly even loving his wife as a stepmother was about as big a dream he dared to have. In his eyes they really were a family. Not the best certainly, but by no means the worst.

It had been a bit disappointing that Fenny hadn’t been as pleased as he had been, but he’d really expected her to panic or get angry or, the most likely situation, go into complete denial. But she had just accepted that it had happened, probably not even thinking about the implications that Brad had. He could only hope that things would get better in time. That had been the trend so far in their relationship, just give Fenny time and things would sort themselves out.

He glanced at his watch and realized it was getting late and he had a show to get to later that evening. With any luck, Fenny had either smoothed things out with her mother or they’d mutually agreed to forget everything that had happened, and she’d had a bit of time to let off some steam with her sketchbook or maybe even getting some work done. “Hey Lil, come on, it’s time to go home,” he called towards the spiral slide that Lilly was climbing up, the static from the plastic frizzing her hair.

“But Daddy, I don’t wanna go yet.”

“Too bad. Aren’t you hungry? I’m starved.”

“But I wanna play more.”

Brad raised his eyebrows and climbed the ladder up to the platform for the slide. He sat down, dangling his feet halfway down the slide as Lilly giggled at him. He said a quick prayer that he didn’t get himself stuck and have to call Fenny to come to the park to oil his pants to get him loose, and slid down the slide, grabbing Lilly on his way down. She launched into a full on giggle fit as he tossed her over his shoulder, tickling her all the while, causing a few of the mothers around to snicker at him. There were no more complaints about wanting to stay and play as he buckled her into her car seat. Brad absently noticed she was looking a bit sun burnt and as he started for home, Lilly talked excitedly about asking Fenny to paint with her with her new paints. Brad smiled to himself smugly.

Gina poked her head into the empty office in the quiet corridor and gratefully slipped inside, closed the door behind herself and pulled out her cell phone.

Three rings before the phone was answered. “Hello?”

“Hey Fen,” she perked.

“Gina,” Fenny gasped. “Wow, I didn’t expect to hear from you.”

“I’m just full of surprises, aren’t I?” Gina chuckled.

“As always. What’re you up to?”

“Now? Hiding from the hairdresser, she wants to tease my hair. The things I do to look glamorous for the Australian public.”

“Oh?” Fenny asked, perplexed.

“Didn’t Paul tell you? I got a job as a newsreader.”

“Wow, go you, very impressive. Regardless of the hair teasing.”

“Well I heard about you doing a show in Vegas. That’s impressive too. If we’re not careful we’ll overshadow the minor celebrity of our husbands.”

“God I hope not,” Fenny laughed.

“So, what have you been up to lately?”

“Well I’ve had to watch Disney’s butchered version of Alice in Wonderland, oh I dunno, seven hundred times in the past month.”

“Is this a Brad obsession or a Lilly obsession?”

“Well Brad’s encouraged it. Then he goes to do a show and leaves me to pretend to care.”

“So, things not going so well in the Sherwood den?” Gina asked, unable to hide the smile from her voice.

“Well, things are going pretty well. The cat and the dog still aren’t getting along too well and I fixed up Lil’s room and I told off the rest of my family, but otherwise, y’know.”

“Excuse me? What did you do to the rest of your family? Does it involve you taking a stand and expressing yourself?”

“Why yes it does,” Fenny declared proudly. “Let’s see, told my father he needs psychological attention, told my brother he’s a selfish prick, called my sister a spoiled bitch, nothing new there, and then I announced to my repressed mother that Brad and I tied the knot.”

“Sounds like that went over well then?”

“Well I called her, she seems alright with it. But like I said, she’s repressed. But really that’s nothing compared to what I’ve heard about you and Paul and, um, Freya?”

“Oh yeah, that,” Gina sighed. “You know me, I can’t fight with the guy. He’s too idiotically adorable to place any real blame on, especially when he’s drunk.”

“Oh my,” Fenny giggled. “What happened?”

“I managed to hate him for about an hour when I found out that when he was letting Freya stay with him for a few days, which was bad enough, she crawled into his bed to give him a blowjob. He painted a drunken apology on the walls and told off Freya, so now all I have to do is worry about working with the skank in a civilized way after she’s borrowed an exorbitant amount of money from us and she tried to molest Danny because she thought he was Paul.”

Fenny shook her head. “Wait, you still have to work with Freya? And how on earth do you confuse that gorgeous hunk of Danny with, well, Paul?”

“Oh don’t give me that,” Gina chided as Fenny released the pent up giggle, “you lust after my husband’s body, admit it.”

“Only as much as you lust over mine,” she countered. “I mean my husband’s. Obviously.” Fenny let out a thoughtful sigh. “Hey Gina? How long does the honeymoon period last?”

“Honeymoon period? I don’t believe in it. Well none of us really have normal relationships, do we. Why?”

“I dunno. It just seems lately that all the romance has been sucked out of my marriage. It’s all the same old routine and taking care of Lilly, Brad and I don’t get any time together and there’s no more of those sweet little romantic gestures or anything. And he’s abstaining.”

“He’s what?” Gina gasped, chuckling at her friend. “I don’t believe it.”

“He wants us to do coupley things. If he suggests a spinning class I’m filing for divorce. I dunno, maybe he’s gone impotent and he won’t admit it, he was too hungover last night to do anything. Or maybe our relationship is just drying up.”

“Yeah, that’s been going around,” Gina agreed.

“What, not Paul too?”

“Well he told me I turned him on by reading the news and then I was standing there in the bathtub naked after the possums had gone and he—”

“Wait, possums?” Fenny gasped. “Do I even want to ask?”

“We’re being invaded by the things, it’s not important. But he didn’t even look at me. Said he’d been imagining me naked all day and he was over it.”

“You know what? Men are stupid. At least ours are.”

“But it’s why we love them.”

“Sad isn’t it?” Fenny grinned.

“Maybe we need to take things into our own hands,” Gina suggested, “spice things up a bit. I mean if they’re really getting bored of us.”

“What are you suggesting we do, indulge their pornographic fantasies?” Fenny chuckled to herself. “Have you heard about the Vegas showgirl fetish that Brad and Greg seem to share?”

“Hon, I started the showgirl fetish,” Gina laughed.

“Oh god, now I’ve got to compare to you in a showgirl outfit, there’s no way.”

“Oh please,” Gina chided, “put on a corset and he’ll be putty in your hands, men are easy to please.”

“It’d be more like play-doh,” Fenny sighed. “No time for any fun with the munchkin around. Have you ever tried to do nasty things to your husband with half your brain freaking out over the prospect of traumatizing a child for life when she walks in to find you straddling her father and biting his neck?”

“No, no I haven’t.”

“Hardly worth the effort. Not that I’ve had much time to test the theory.”

“Well Paul and I have had a lot of practice lately. Although I don’t know if I was there every time, judging by Paul’s ‘over it’ attitude.”

Fenny frowned at the phone. “I don’t think I needed to know any of that.”

The door opened and Gina spun round from her perch on the desk to see Danny grinning at her. “Hold on a sec,” she said and covered the phone. “What?” she asked Danny.

“They’re starting to go mental without you around, you really should get ready to go on the air.”

“Crap,” she grumbled.

“And tell Fen hi for me.”

“How did you…” Danny just shrugged and leaned against the doorjamb. “Hey Fen,” she said into her cell phone. “I gotta go and deliver the news in a professional fashion while swallowing my need to put Freya’s clicker somewhere unfortunate. And Dan says hi.”

“Well hi to Dan, and good luck with everything. And give Freya a kick in the shin for me, huh?”

“Gladly. Bye Fen.”

“Bye.”

Gina clicked off her phone and stretched, bracing herself for what was to come. “Fen says hi.”

“Good. I ran into Freya on my way over here. She was sobbing and reeked of beer. Am I wrong in assuming Paul was involved?”

“I hope so. I only wish I was there to see it.”

Danny let out an appreciative laugh. “So, how’s Fen?”

“If you must know, she’s celibate and thinking of renting a show girl outfit.” He stopped short as Gina disappeared into the makeup area, chuckling at him as she settled herself in to have the makeup liberally applied with a trowel.