Gina adjusted her grey Dirty Dancing shirt and sighed at her reflection. She was dressed down in jeans a t-shirt; surely this was enough of an indication that she didn’t want anything more from the evening than a bit of movie watching and snacks. God, who was she kidding. They’d had sex when they were coughing up mucus and flu ridden. Unbrushed hair and a t-shirt were not a turn off. Gina took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I am dating Lee Tucker…I am dating Lee Tucker…I am dating Lee Tucker…I will not give into Paul McDermott…I will not give in to Paul McDermott…I will not give in to Paul McDermott…” She was pondering whether extra underwear was necessary when there was a knock at the door. “You are strong, Coleman, you will not go back there!” she snapped at her reflection before heading out of her room.

“Hey Genie,” Paul smiled, a wicked twinkle in his eye that Gina picked up on immediately and tried not to blush. “You ready for some serious Swayze love.”

“I’m always up for Swayze love,” she nodded as moved aside to let him in. “Although this time it’s tinged with sadness.”

“Ah well, see I knew you’d say that.”

“So you’re psychic now?”

“Baby, I know exactly what you’re thinking at this very moment.”

“Oh yeah what?” Gina mused crossing her arms.

Paul narrowed his eyes, then slowly went wide eyed and let his mouth fall open. “That’s disgusting. You dirty, dirty woman.” Gina tried to fight a smile and shook her head and Paul cackled rather mischievously. “Anyway, couple of things to help ease you through the deep loss of Mr Swayze that you feel…”

“TROY!” Gina squealed and snatched the mongoose from Paul. “I never thought I’d miss his cold, dead eyes, but I do.”

“He’s missed you too,” Paul declared. “Pines terribly, drinks a lot and is up most of the night watching British movies from the 40s where everyone talks like they’ve got a fucking melon up their arse.”

“Aw, poor Troy,” Gina mused as she stroked his fur. “Perhaps I’ll have to start letting him spend the night.”

“On his own? I don’t know if he’s ready for that.”

“Of course he is,” Gina smiled, glancing at Paul. “We can stay up and watch British movies together.”

Paul pursed his lips and then dropped his bag onto a chair before reaching into his pocket. “So I thought about what else I could do to help. Y’know, the best way to lighten the mood.”

“I’m not drinking tequila.”

“I didn’t…what? No…crazy woman,” Paul frowned. “I figured we’d get toasted instead,” he added, producing a joint.

“I don’t…”

“Oh yes you do…I remember Amsterdam.”

“That was on…”

“Twice.”

“Yeah, and what happened? I did silly things.”

“Exactly.”

“I groped you.”

“Once again, I’m not seeing the problem.”

Gina opened and closed her mouth a couple of times. “I just don’t think this is a very…safe…idea.”

“Why? Don’t think you can trust yourself if you’re stoned?”

“Oh I trust myself, it’s you I don’t trust.”

“Well you made that evident in the divorce,” Paul groused, and then threw his arms in the air. “And see this, this is why I come baring medicinal herbs, because otherwise a whole pile of shitty tension is going to come between us instead of two friends hanging out.”

Gina cocked her head to the side, Paul looked exasperated and a bit pathetic and she let Lee’s rumpled good looks slip back into her mind and sighed. “Ok, one joint, McDermott.”

---

“Fen, you don’t drink,” Brad gasped as Fenny searched Paul’s kitchen for a couple of shot glasses. She found them and headed back into the living room. She collected everything off the coffee table and dumped it on a chair before she put the shot glasses on the table, opened the tequila and poured.

“Drink,” she ordered and Brad sunk to the floor across from her and grabbed his shot. “Drink!”

“Ok,” Brad said quickly, and downed his shot.

“Oh god that’s disgusting,” Fenny gagged and refilled the glasses.

“Fen, have you lost your mind?” he gasped as they drank the shots and she refilled again.

“We have catching up to do, lots of catching up,” Fenny said breathlessly. “I want it to be as painless as possible.”

“Are you going to get me drunk and have your way with me?”

“I’m not really sure,” she shrugged. “Want to break open the pizza and put on a movie.”

“I’m a little scared to say no at this point.”

“You’ve been held at gunpoint. This isn’t scary.”

“This is kinda up there with having a bull eyeing off my nutsack,” Brad declared as he put on a DVD and grabbed a slice of pizza.

“Which one did you pick?”

“Robin Hood: Men in Tights.”

“Feeling nostalgic, are you?”

“I was wearing those tights when the bull was eyeing off my nutsack.”

“Can we stop talking about your balls, please.”

“If we must.”

They fell silent as they worked on slices of pizza and watched the movie start.

“Carey Elwes is hot.”

“How is that helping our relationship.”

“Who cares.”

“Fen!”

“I think I’m tipsy already.”

Brad pouted and reached for the bottle of tequila. “I don’t think…”

“Don’t touch that bottle!”

“Yes dear,” he paused for a moment. “So how do you want to do this bonding thing?”

“Let’s just watch some Mel Brooks and work that out later,” Fenny shrugged as she reached for more pizza.

---

I’m scared of never feeling my whole life, the way I feel when I’m with you…

“Y’know that was the last thing Dan said to me,” Gina sighed as she passed the joint back to Paul.

“Really? Wow…” Paul sniffed as he took a toke. “You really had him by the balls.”

“Didn’t mean to,” Gina pouted, taking the joint back from Paul.

“So did you guys ever, y’know…”

“What?”

“Fuck.”

“What type of question is that?”

“We’re friends, you can tell me.”

“Never.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why didn’t you root him?”

“Because I fell in love with you instead.”

“So you would’ve fucked him if I hadn’t swept you off your feet.”

“Swept? You drunkenly fumbled your way into my life.”

“Don’t avoid my question.”

“Would I have ended up with Dan if I hadn’t met you?”

“Yeah.”

“Yes, probably, maybe…I don’t know.”

“I kinda thought you’d dump me for him, actually.”

“Why?”

“Have you seen him? He’s like some sort of god. I’ve seen the way women look at him.”

“I’ve seen the way they look at you, too.”

Paul smiled at looked away. “That whole feeling you whole life thing, have you ever thought that about me?”

Gina glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, “Yes.”

“Me too,” Paul said quietly, before going cross-eyed. “With you of course, not with me because that would be super weird.”

Gina started to giggle, the drugs putting ‘you might actually want to do him’ above ‘you’re dating Lee Tucker’. “We’re going to need another joint.”

“How did you know I had more than one?”

“I know all.”

“What am I thinking then?”

“They’re red satin, with a hint of black lace.”

Paul went wide-eyed. “Fuck, you do know all. Get out my head, crazy lady.”

---

“Oh god,” Fenny winced as she downed another shot of tequila. She’s lost count of how many she’d had and was ignoring the burning in her oesophagus. “We’re going to need more drink and another movie.”

“I’ll do that,” Brad paused to burp and then unsteadily got to his feet. He clumsily snatched up Blazing Saddles from the corner of the coffee table staggered to the DVD player. He was staggering a little through numbness and a lot through drunkeness. He managed to swap DVDs and then lost his balance and grabbed a nearby shelf knocking half its contents to the floor.

“Ooh you made mess,” Fenny giggled as she got to her feet in a motion reminiscent of a newborn foal and headed toward the kitchen.

“I’ll clean it later,” Brad shrugged as he slumped back to his position on the floor.

Fenny discovered her balance was rather wonky and used various hard surfaces to keep upright. Reaching the kitchen she began to search cupboards until she found Paul’s stack of booze. She didn’t know what any of it was. Eventually she picked something that smelt peachy and gingerly made her way back into the living room leaving the remainder of the bottles open on the kitchen bench.

“Whassat?” Brad asked as he sculled the last of the bottle of tequila.

“Smells like peaches.”

“I like peaches.”

“Me too.”

“It’s nice we have that in common.”

“We do don’t we.”

“You don’t think Pauly will mind us sampling this?”

“Nah,” Fenny giggled as she messily poured two shots of what was actually peach vodka into the shot glasses.

“I’m so glad we’re working through our problems,” Brad grinned stupidly before they downed their shots. “Hmm we’re almost out of pizza too.”

“Ooh let’s see if Pauly has any food,” Fenny enthused and once again did her foal impression, this time less successfully as she fell into an armchair. Brad snorted with laughter at her and Fenny giggled manically as she got back to her feet.

“I should help you,” he mused and they both clumsily made it back into the kitchen and began to search for edibles.

“PIZZA!” Fenny declared triumphantly from the freezer.

“Excellent,” Brad cheered and somehow they managed, with a team effort to get it out of the box and onto a tray. “Needs more cheese.”

“So put more on it.”

“I shall,” Brad opened the fridge and found a packet of cheese slices, bacon and gherkins and decided the pizza could use all of those ingredients.

“You cook the pizza and I’ll get some more drinks,” Fenny declared and grabbed three random bottles she’s abandoned earlier.

---

“So Red Dawn was before Dirty Dancing?” Paul asked as he watched the screen transfixed and shoved corn chips in his mouth.

“Uh huh,” Gina nodded as she was on her fourth TimTam. “Which mean Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey worked together before they teamed up on Dirty Dancing and I can never understand why this isn’t mentioned anywhere, ever.”

“Baffling,” Paul agreed as a loud crash came from the laundry. “What the fuck was that?”

“Possums?” Gina winced and gingerly looked toward the hall. “You should go and investigate.”

“Me? Why me?”

“Because you’re a big strong man and I’m um not.”

“You’ve hit people.”

“You’ve shot people.”

Paul sighed. “Fine we’ll both go an investigate.” He got to his feet, seemed to forget why he’d done so and then grabbed a rather large, wooden giraffe as a weapon. Gina followed suite by grabbing a set of knitting needles and spun them in her hands like a deranged Ninja Turtle. They cautiously edged toward the hall. “On three,” Paul whispered. “One, two…THREE!” they jumped into the darkness as Gina flicked the light switch.

“All clear,” she panted and twirled her knitting needles.

They continued to the laundry where they could hear strange noises coming from the darkness. Paul shot Gina a curious look and she shrugged in return. He took a deep breath and simultaneously jumped into the room, switched on the light and held the wooden giraffe menacingly. They were greeted however, by the the tipped over laundry basket with one ginger paw poking out feebly scratching at the lino floor.

“Lewis you idiot,” Gina sighed as Paul began to snicker. She found herself laughing herself as she rescued the traumatized cat from his fabric prison.

“I never really thought there was a burglar,” Paul declared and they giggled their way to the living room.

“Sure you didn’t,” Gina sniggered and poked him with a needle.

“Stupid drugs, make you paranoid.”

“And hungry.”

“Yes hungry.”

“More chips?”

“More chips and more drugs.”

“No…”

“We’ve half a joint left, live a little.”

“Fine but I need more chips and maybe a milkshake before we go on.”

“Ooh milkshakes.”

“I didn’t say you were having one.”

“Too late,” Paul enthused as he sauntered into the kitchen and began hunting for milkshake ingredients. “Hmm strawberries…”

---

“Well we’ve eaten most of the pizza and we’re quite happy now,” Brad mused as he licked melted cheese from his fingers. “What should we talk about now? Any ideas.”

“Did you have sex with anyone else when I was doing French things,” Fenny asked as she grabbed something in a blue bottle and attempted to sit next to Brad. She wobbled and half fell in his lap.

“Don’t you think that’s a rather deep place to start,” he blanched surprised that copious amounts of alcohol had turned his wife into some sort of desperate valley girlesque creature.

“We’re being open and honest.”

“Well in that case,” he swallowed doing his best to focus. “No, no I didn’t.”

“You’re lying.”

“No I’m not.”

“Look me in the eye and say that.”

Brad drank a shot and turned to Fenny. “Ok, there was one groupie.”

“Brad!” Fenny gasped, waving a slice of pizza about. “I hope she was of age.”

“Of course she…” he paused. “I’m sure she was.”

Fenny pouted, absent-mindedly poking out her chest. “Was she sexier than me?”

“She was drunker than you.”

“Woo!”

“So did you sample anybody’s croissant?”

“Of course not, I am chaste.”

“Fen.”

“Brad.”

“Open and honest remember.”

Fenny sunk back a little and focussed her attention on her empty shot glass. “So there was a little sleeping with my lecturer thing…”

Brad dropped his shot glass and split peach vodka in his lap. “Shit!”

“It was just sex.”

“Gah, was he, like, old?”

“I want it known I was lonely all the way there in Frenchland.”

“You could’ve come home.”

“Well I didn’t think of that.”

“So you shagged an old French guy instead.”

“He looked young for his age,” Fenny frowned and glanced at Brad who looked mortified. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like I’m some dirty whore.”

“On the contrary, I like it when you’re a dirty whore.”

Fenny giggled and shakily got to her feet. She stepped over Brad and landed in his lap straddling him. “You like Madam Fenella.”

“I love Madam Fenella,” Brad mused as he gave Fenny’s breasts a squeeze and made honking noises.

Fenny squealed with laughter and began fumbling with Brad’s shirt buttons. He watched on, amused as she fought a lack of coordination to undo them. “I want my tattoo.”

“Your tattoo?”

“It’s my name,” she said adamantly, finally pulling open his shirt and admiring the ink on his chest.

“Well then I want my tattoo,” Brad declared as he let his hands slid up Fenny’s thighs to the button of her pants.

“Brad!” Fenny squealed as he unfastened her pants and began trying to pull them off.

“I want my tattoo, Fenella,” he declared as she tried to stand. He got to his knees and yanked down her pants, causing her to topple over in a fit of laughter and land in the pizza box. Brad unlaced her sneakers and chucked them across the room and then wrestled off her pants and lobbed them over the couch. “Are you wearing Superman panties?”

“And matching bra,” Fenny laughed, lifting up her shirt to flash him.

“There are no words to express how turned on I am right now,” Brad declared, cocking his head to the side.

---

“I’m all out of chips and milkshakes,” Gina declared as she returned from raiding the kitchen for yet more food. Paul had sprawled himself out on the couch and pouted at the lack of food knowledge. “You gonna move?”

“Nope,” Paul grinned as Gina shrugged and clambered over the end of the couch, between his legs and settled on top of him. Paul in return gave her rear a squeeze, felt his way up her back and then went back to her rear.

“Having a good grope?” she asked, propping herself up on his chest.

“Yes, why aren’t you?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Because I can’t feel your arse from here,” she countered.

“Can’t have that,” Paul grinned, and before she knew it Gina was on her back, Paul between her thighs, his arms wrapped tightly around her. “Can you reach now?”

Gina giggled as she squeezed his shoulders before gently feeling her way down to his rear which she squeezed, causing him to make a some sort of excited growl.

“Can we have sex?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“Are you begging me?”

“It’s been a while since I’ve had relations with a woman…”

“Have you been with anyone since the divorce?” Gina asked, and Paul’s eyes went doe-like. “I was the last person you had sex with?” he nodded slowly. “Please tell me you’ve…y’know…had some self loving…”

“Yeah, but it’s not the same obviously.”

“Aww Pauly,” Gina giggled as her hands moved up his back. “That’s really sad.”

“You’re mocking me, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m just really wasted and can’t stop giggling,” she mused. “And I’m hungry.”

“Let me have sex with you and I’ll buy you a pizza,” Paul offered, causing Gina to snort with laughter. This in turn made Paul start to giggle and gave him the opportunity to press his body as close to hers as possible. “Come on, woman, give me something to work with here.”

Gina sighed, her lips creeping closer to his, “You’re pathetic.”

“And really, really horny,” Paul added, inching his lips closer to hers.

A smile crept to Gina’s mouth as she softly brushed her nose against his, and then let her lips meet his. They hesitantly shared a couple of rather chaste closed-mouth kisses before falling into a much deeper kiss.

“I’m too stoned for this,” Gina said breathlessly. “I won’t have sex with you in this condition.”

“You’ve had sex with me when I’ve been drunk.”

“I meant me.”

Paul let out a whine and buried his face in her neck. “You’re killing me.”

“You’re still the world’s greatest kisser, if that’s any consolation.”

He lifted his head, sighed and gave her a wry smile, “I love you Genie.”

“I love you too,” Gina mused and licked the end of Paul’s nose, making him cackle. “Now will you please buy me a pizza!”

---

“Are you just gonna stare at my crotch for the rest of the evening?” Fenny asked lazily as she lay sprawled pantless on the floor.

“I’m considering it,” Brad declared, his eyes firmly focused on her Superman panties.

“You’re not sexually attracted to me anymore, are you?” Fenny huffed as she struggled to her feet. “You find me repulsive, admit it.”

“Are you shitting me?”

“Then why won’t you kiss me?”

“I didn’t think you wanted me to,” Brad frowned as he used the couch as a prop to get to his feet. “You left me, remember. I figured all that stuff was off limits.”

“You fucking idiot,” Fenny gasped. She pulled her shirt over her head and clumsily dropped it to the floor, then slipped on the pizza box and fell into him. “And you always said I was spineless,” she breathed. Sliding her hands up his bare chest, she dropped a gentle kiss on his tattoo, then stood on her toes to hungrily bring her lips to his. Brad eagerly kissed her back. His hands roamed her body as he pulled it close to his.

“Shit,” Brad panted as he forced his lips from hers.

“What’s wrong?” Fenny gasped. “Is it me?”

“No, I really, really have to pee.”

Brad made a mad dash for the bathroom as Fenny pouted and glanced around the room. She let out a hum and headed in the direction of the hall and hopefully Brad’s room. Fenny started well, then smacked into the CD tower, knocking Paul’s CDs onto the floor. “Oops,” she giggled and then continued until she reached the hall.

Brad reappeared from the bathroom, having lost his shirt entirely, and strode toward Fenny. He backed her against the wall, pressed himself against her and began to gently kiss and nibble her neck. Fenny let out a very un-meek moan and wrapped her arms around him, enjoying the movement of the muscles in his back as he held her.

“Which is your room?”

“Who cares,” Brad mumbled as he tried to work the clasp of her bra.

“Not here,” Fenny gasped, unfastening the button on his jeans.

Brad let out something resembling a whimper, and with Fenny still wrapped around him, managed to manoeuvre her into his bedroom. They stumbled kissing, groping and laughing toward the bed until they tumbled onto the mattress.

“So much for discussing our relationship issues,” Brad mused as Fenny began dropping kisses all over his chest.

“Was there something pressing you wanted to discuss?” she asked as she traced around his nipple with her tongue.

“Well I did think now was the time to bring up how much you owe me for looking after your cat,” Brad smirked. “You?”

“Yeah why are you still wearing your pants?” Fenny countered, raising an eyebrow.

“Consider them gone,” he enthused, quickly discarding his jeans before he pushed Fenny back onto the bed and brought his lips hungrily to hers again.

---

“I’m sleepy,” Gina declared as she lazily rested her head on Paul’s shoulder after they’d polished off a pizza, garlic bread and chocolate bavarian dessert.

“Then you should go to bed,” Paul yawned as he rested his head against hers and finished licking bavarian from his fingers..

“You have to come too.”

“I tried that earlier, you knocked me back.”

“I’m serious.”

“Yeah right you’re out of it.”

“So are you.”

“But I do it well,” Paul mused and patted her thigh. “You not so much.”

“You’re silly,” Gina giggled and struggled to her feet. She held out her hand, which Paul took, and she dragged him to his feet.

“Well you’re silly too,” Paul laughed lazily. “All that blonde hair, fantastic breasts and racy underwear is just ridiculous.”

“Well your arse,” she used her free hand to pat his rear. “Is just hysterical.”

“If you’d said my cock I might have been offended.”

“That’s pretty funny too,” Gina cackled and Paul laughed in spite of himself. “Bed time,” she declared and turned to lead them to the hall. She stopped, turned back around and snatched up Troy. “Can’t forget our fur child.”

“I should think not,” Paul agreed as they headed down the hall. “I don’t want to call child services on you.”

“See there’s you being silly again.”

“Troy’s welfare is very important to me.”

“The poor thing has been down your pants,” Gina teased as she clambered onto the bed.

“So have you,” Paul countered as she flumped next to her.

“Ohh touche,” Gina giggled as they burst into laughter that lasted an entire five minutes. They calmed down and Gina snuggled up to Paul, with Troy wrapped protectively in her arms. “G’night Pauly,” she cooed and brushed her lips against his.

“G’night Genie,” Paul sighed and kissed her again. “Sorry for getting you baked.”

“You’re forgiven,” she said softly. “I mean Fen went to your place with a bottle of tequila. So I think that’s kinda worse.”

“Oh that’s going to really piss me off when I’m sober,” he breathed before drifting off to sleep.