Gnome & Harriet's Fondue Pit
Welcome
Welcome to the Fondue Pit, where Gnome and Harriet abuse Paul McDermott, Greg Proops, Brad Sherwood, a stuffed mongoose, international copyright laws, cheese puns, and an endless line of imaginary people for their own amusement.
The fondue has overflowed once again, so we’re digging the stories out of the muck. Everything should be up reasonably soon. Ish.
We started on ff.net, before they shut the fandom down for being RPF. We shifted to Geocities, before they disappeared forever. We became grownups with our own server space…that was then hacked by McIver, or the Russians, or possibly someone’s lawyers, we’ll never know for sure. But we’re rebuilding, slowly, because we’re incredibly lazy. Most of the Fondue is up, and we’re getting The Other Bits® sorted eventually.
It may be worth noting to new readers that the Fondue Series was started during the dark ages, at the very beginning of this century. We barely had cell phones. GPS wasn’t a thing. Think how different the kidnappings would have gone if Brad could just open up Snapchat on his phone to see exactly where Greg was being held? (Who am I kidding, no one over the age of 30 can operate Snapchat. Although I’ll bet Gina could find Paul, he probably sends her naughty snaps all the time.) So please, put yourselves 15 years in the past, maybe put on some cargo pants or a slip dress, listen to some Nickelback or some Christina on your 2nd gen iPod, and put your flip-phone on vibrate before diving in.
Do you love us? Hate us? Need weird Australian or American slang explained? Broken links or gaping plot holes driving you mad? Wanna flame us? Awesome. You can talk to us at fonduepit[at]gmail[dot]com.
The Stories
All stories rated somewhere between PG13 and R – plenty of swearing, violence, angst, and vague sexy bits. Obligatory disclaimer: We don’t own anything or anybody. We mean no harm. We’re not making any money — in fact, we’re losing money on the url for this nonsense. Please don’t sue us, we love you. Well, most of you.
THE PREQUELS
Downunder & Backwards
The story that started it all. The idea for this fic was that there was no idea, just a chain of unlikely events, set against the harsh Australian outback (and a few harsh Australian towns as well). The Whose Line cast never saw it coming. It’s the worst hangover you’ll ever read!
Back Downunder
The sequel to the story that started it all. Also, Gina’s first appearance!
Harriet had a few people screaming for a sequel, so she put mind to keyboard and this is what came out. Lots of violence, a little bit of romance, and just as many laughs at the first series.
A Well-Respected Stranger
Greg meets an amateur improv comic. Should’ve been a useless one-off, but the rest is history.
THE FONDUE SERIES
A Downunder/Strangers crossover. What would happen if Strangers’ Fenny met Downunder’s Ritza, and are Gina and Greg just good friends?
It’s Not Over Until the Fondue Burns
The Fondue gang regroup in Australia for another adventure Downunder, where they’re joined by Gina’s ex-husband while Brad’s ex-girlfriend seeks revenge.
First they were Downunder. Then they were Strangers. Then came the Sex and the Lies and everything Burned. Sit back, dim the lights, put on some soft music, and watch as the Fondue Burns.
A year after that taping, everyone falls back into the pot. The Fondue gang are somewhat reluctantly reunited in Europe, and meet some interesting new friends. Like a drug-dealing pimp named Don. Will things finally get resolved between the lust, lies, and laughter?
With the fork now broken we drop back into the pot of boiling oil. It’s been nine months; have things changed?
Can Fenny’s relationship with Brad survive with Ritza back on the scene? Will Gina and Paul end up in divorce court? And can there possibly be another senseless kidnapping? Most importantly, how will the Edinburgh Fringe Festival goers think of Paul’s drunken singing?!
A month ago they were beaten and tormented. They encountered death and ran for their lives. A month later and they’re faced with much worse — domesticity. Can Fenny cope with being a stepmother, or will it be the end of her and Brad’s relationship? Will Gina and Paul finally stay on the same continent? And is Greg’s therapist going to be able to cope with his latest set of problems?
The storm clouds started gathering in the final part of Ado and now the heavens have opened and the ‘Wrath’ is finally upon our group of anti-heroes. Just how are they going to cope with their latest set of problems when none of them are talking?
The dust has settled after the Wrath, a few years have passed, and the Fondue folks have been scattered to the winds. But the universe has once again decided to drag the motley together again in the cheesiest way possible. (In Progress)
Fondue: The Flame That Melts
It’s been seventeen years – SEVENTEEN! – since Gina, Paul, Fenny, Brad, and occasionally Greg have crashed into each other’s world repeatedly, frequently, and to varying degrees of angst. It’s been five years since we last checked in with them. Is it possible that they finally sorted out their lives? Knowing them, probably not…. (In Progress)
OTHER BITS
Welcome to the world of Joaquin, an artist/graphic designer, and Adele, a writer/publisher. As individuals they’re pretty screwed up: Jo has fled to Australia to escape her mad hippie parents while Adele is intensely jaded after a series of bad relationships. Together they’re a disaster just waiting to happen, especially when they get involved in each other’s love lives. (In Progress)